My Facebook Independence Manifesto

[Editor's note] The recent news that Facebook lost millions of users in May didn't suprise me one bit. Thirteen days ago I deactivated the Facebook account I’ve had since the summer of 2004.

Back then the social network was a small operation, limited to just a few colleges. Facebook was fun, simple, and a welcomed relief from the land of MySpace. More to the point, it was greatly appreciated by a college freshman eager to make friends in a new town.

But 6 years, 2 universities, and 415 friends later, it was time to call it quits.

The wherefore and why are very simple. Somewhere along the way Facebook turned on me. It became a saturated, ever-present presence in my life. It was in my computer, on my phone, and talked about in conversation. It was the first thing I’d check in the morning and the last I checked before going to sleep. I started thinking in terms of status updates. Inadvertently, I stopped watching the movies I’d pop in because I was FB chatting the entire time. I communicated with members of my family via Facebook. I even created a profile for my dog.

Adding to all that, I found myself immersed in the lives of a lot of people I barely knew, people I didn’t know and people I have never met. I started to know more about the people I didn't know than about the people I've known and loved for years. What’s worse, the perceived lives of these strangers started to reflect negatively on my life. It seemed as though everyone was having more fun than me.

And it’s not just me. Countless studies have been published on the adverse affects of social networking. Just the other day I was in line at the Subway on campus and the 6 people around me were hunched over their phones, checking their feed of friends. None of them were aware of anything going on around them.

That’s the ironic problem of keeping up with the social world of Facebook; it makes you anti-social. It keeps you from engaging in real life because so much of your time and energy are consumed by the cyber life. You’re not present in the happenings of your life. The fat space people in Wall·E spring to mind… Moreover, everyone is on it and everyone is saying something. But when everyone talks, no one really listens.

So thirteen days ago I made a conscious decision to turn off my computer, delete the iPhone app, and go play fetch with my dog. I decided to be present. I decided to be an active participant in the world around me. Inversely, I decided to have less known about me. A little mystery goes a long way in the era of Weinergate.

I know social media is the way of the future. I just hope that it doesn’t come at the expense of being your authentic self.